This past weekend, I attended a school alumni gathering at the beach (even though I stated about six months ago I had outgrown attending such events). There was a part of me that knew the gathering wouldn’t be as fun, especially since I had already been to the beach with my fiancée a few days before.
I had a conversation with a fellow alumnus who was about a year older than me at the gathering. She said that it was good that she came because many alumni attended and at least there was free food. She seemed disengaged in continuing a conversation with me as it went on so I left after few minutes.
Maybe Noy Sauce’s flirting game was rusty now that he’s engaged to his fiancée that the conversation didn’t end so well. Or maybe she was insecure feeling old.
Joking aside, the brief conversation showed me how far my mentality towards material things has changed.
When I started attending the university back in September 2008, I was addicted to free things, known as swag. Growing up in a lower-middle class family, getting free swag made me feel like I was scraping the meat off the bone of life’s opportunities. Whether it was a free T-shirt, cheap pens, a tote bag, or free food, I was eager to attend such events thinking I was saving money.
That mentality continued throughout my 20s when I participated in running races and professional conferences. I made sure to always get a T-shirt from such events.
However, as fun as it was making sure I got free swag on events and gatherings, holding onto such a mentality of anticipating free giveaways was holding me back. Holding me back in the sense of knowing my own worth, and expecting others to raise their own standards so that I can give myself the permission to raise my own standards.
The week before I went to the alumni gathering, I had dinner with my mentor. Before I began this journey of intense personal development, when I was unemployed for almost 18 months, she gave me an opportunity to do IT work for her small business, setting up online stores for her products on Amazon Marketplace and Shopify.
Working for her taught me to always take action even when we don’t know all the answers to the problems we are trying to solve. Working for her also taught me to know my worth, not short-changing myself because I’m trying to be nice. Lastly, working for her taught me to not settle for mediocrity, even if it meant letting go of some friendships.
My mentor asked me what I thought about how things are in the world these days, especially after driving past a gas station selling gas for $7/gallon, food being more expensive at the restaurant, and the elections taking place.
I told my mentor, “Regardless whoever the President is, life moves on. Even though I am displeased with what’s going on in this world (with high gas prices, rapid inflation, and countries being led into unnecessary wars because of communists), change starts with me. I can make a greater impact with how I treat my mother, fiancée, and you than complain about what’s messed up in this world. Giving people money won’t solve their problems. The most important lessons you taught me are that I can achieve the results I want in life by being resourceful to find solutions to problems, believing in myself, and revolving around people who share similar values as me.”
My mentor replied with the secret sauce to it all, “See! It’s all mindset, right?”
I replied, “Yes, it is.”
And that summed up my trip to the alumni gathering. Before going to the beach, I ate a crispy pork banh mi sandwich and drank Wintermelon boba milk tea with pudding, knowing that I shouldn’t rely on the food being served at the gathering to nourish me. I’ve experienced numerous times attending gatherings, thinking that the hosts will serve food, only to be hungry by the end because little to no food were served.
By the time I arrived at the gathering, they were running out of food so I settled for a hot dog.
My fiancée laughed that I spent $30 on gas and $15 for parking just to eat a hot dog. HAHAHA 😂
If we wait for some “authority figure” in this world to come and save us, we will be disappointed. That authority figure whom we wait for will more often than not, serve themselves before trying to serve us because he/she is human.
But if we take action, making calculated risks in the process, we find courage and build the confidence in the midst of our fears to be the change that not only saves us, but also those who matter most to us. In the process, our lives change because we change.
This past Sunday celebrates the Ascension of Christ (or the 7th Sunday of Easter in some places), where Jesus ascends to Heaven, leaving his disciples the responsibility to continue His mission in this world.
Before Jesus ascended, He told his disciples, “It is not for you to know the times or seasons that the Father has established by his own authority. But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, throughout Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.”
The disciples must have been scared, feeling uncertain, when Jesus ascended to Heaven, as they thought, “What happens next?”
Yet, they answered the call to continue spreading the Word of God, trusting that God will provide for them in their journeys, even if doing so meant laying down their lives.
We are called each day to share our gifts with others. Whether that’s our sincerity, compassion, and generosity of time and resources. We may be disappointed and figuratively burned in the process for being unappreciated and taken for granted, but that shouldn’t stop us from living a Rich Life in God’s eyes.
Those times of disappointment are foundations that build stronger and healthier boundaries, perseverance, patience, and a mindset of abundance. We take personal responsibility that the power has been with us the whole time to take action and be the change we want to see in this world. As our mindset changes with the actions we take, our world changes as we value ourselves more and know our worth better.
God will provide us with opportunities that will not only nourish us in this world, but also those who matter most to us. No “authority figure” or earthly savior necessary.
Heavenly Father, thank You for showing us everyday and especially this past Sunday that the power to make change in this world lies within us to be that change. There is so much Resistance in facing our fears and answering Your call, but Your Love and mercy help us take that first step, and the next steps. In doing so, our mindsets change as we develop the skills to ascend in this world and live a Rich Life in Your eyes. Trust in You. Perseverance. Patience. Knowing our worth. And a mindset of abundance. We pray for the Grace to be humble as we strive to be best versions of ourselves and be the change in this world.
In this we pray, Amen.
(The cover photo was taken on my graduation eleven years ago, as my Mama hugged and congratulated me.)